When I was about 15 I had my heart broken. (Who didn't?!) At 15 when a boy hurts you, you feel as if your entire world is collapsing around you. I felt that pain and at the time I thought nothing could hurt worse. (What did I know; did I mention I was 15?!?!)
Music has always been my refuge when times get tough. I find great solace in songs that empower me during my darkest hour. At the time Alanis Morrissette had just burst onto the scene with her Jagged Little Pill album. The first release from that album was a lovely little ditty called "You Oughta Know". The lyrics said a lot about my feelings at the time. This song became my anthem back then. And I must say, it's become my anthem again now. Although this time my heartbreak is based on more than some teenage punk standing me up. But somehow the feelings are eerily similar ...
The song is not a sappy little ditty. It's a "suck it douchelord" kind of ditty. Yup, my anthem. My Alanis. :)
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Poker face
I don't normally find myself in a foul mood. Generally I am one of the most pleasant people I know. But lately I've been on edge.
I have quite a few reasons to be on the brink these days. For starters, back in April I became a casualty of this lovely recession and lost my job. It's the first time in my career that I've ever been laid off. It's a weird feeling. It's like someone breaking up with you. Typically I'm the one doing the breaking up. I leave the job because I start to fantasize about throwing things at my coworkers. That's when I know my time has come. I update the ole resume and begin my search. It usually pays off in a number of weeks (worst case scenario in a few months), and before long I'm happy as a clam at a new gig. It's been my "M-O" for the past 10 years of my career. But this time my employer broke up with me. I was dumbfounded. And in this economy my usual plan isn't working. I've been forced to come up with a plan B, and sadly I don't know what plan B is yet.
Speaking of break-ups, I'm also in the midst of a divorce. Yep. To add insult to injury not only did my employer break up with me, but my husband actually broke up with me too!!!!! Now granted we've had a turbulent relationship that has spanned 13 years. There have been lots of issues over the years. Some "normal" ups and downs, but more downs than ups unfortunately. We've been married for 9 years and have 3 beautiful, awesome, amazing, albeit at times maddening, children. So it couldn't have all been bad, right? But after 13 years together, 9 years of marriage, 3 kids, and a new house (just recently purchased btw) the husband has decided he's done with me. To add salt to the wound, he left me for another woman. Again I am just dumbfounded. (There's that word again - wth!)
I truly feel as if I've lost complete control of my life. I am trying like hell to hold it together for my children, but it's not easy. Even though I am supermom, I am still only human. If you cut me do I not bleed?! Damn straight I do. So while all of this is going on I can't let my kids see my hand. I have to stay strong for their sake. I have to maintain my poker face ....
I have quite a few reasons to be on the brink these days. For starters, back in April I became a casualty of this lovely recession and lost my job. It's the first time in my career that I've ever been laid off. It's a weird feeling. It's like someone breaking up with you. Typically I'm the one doing the breaking up. I leave the job because I start to fantasize about throwing things at my coworkers. That's when I know my time has come. I update the ole resume and begin my search. It usually pays off in a number of weeks (worst case scenario in a few months), and before long I'm happy as a clam at a new gig. It's been my "M-O" for the past 10 years of my career. But this time my employer broke up with me. I was dumbfounded. And in this economy my usual plan isn't working. I've been forced to come up with a plan B, and sadly I don't know what plan B is yet.
Speaking of break-ups, I'm also in the midst of a divorce. Yep. To add insult to injury not only did my employer break up with me, but my husband actually broke up with me too!!!!! Now granted we've had a turbulent relationship that has spanned 13 years. There have been lots of issues over the years. Some "normal" ups and downs, but more downs than ups unfortunately. We've been married for 9 years and have 3 beautiful, awesome, amazing, albeit at times maddening, children. So it couldn't have all been bad, right? But after 13 years together, 9 years of marriage, 3 kids, and a new house (just recently purchased btw) the husband has decided he's done with me. To add salt to the wound, he left me for another woman. Again I am just dumbfounded. (There's that word again - wth!)
I truly feel as if I've lost complete control of my life. I am trying like hell to hold it together for my children, but it's not easy. Even though I am supermom, I am still only human. If you cut me do I not bleed?! Damn straight I do. So while all of this is going on I can't let my kids see my hand. I have to stay strong for their sake. I have to maintain my poker face ....
Monday, March 29, 2010
Empty Nest
My daughter is off on a week-long trip with her class. She's been on this trip before. In fact, she went on the exact same trip last year. Since we bought a house and moved, she changed school districts and has the fortunate experience of going on a similar trip twice. This is much to my dismay as I had to fork over $200 both times, but I digress ....
Mydirt bag husband and I are going through a separation and divorce. He's been taking the kids every other weekend, leaving me in this really big house all alone. Alone? As a mom of three I am pretty much NEVER alone. I have found myself feeling really lonely when my kids are not here. I miss them. Despite the constant chaos and total lack of "me" time, I genuinely miss my kids when they are not around. I guess I am preparing myself for empty nest syndrome when they get older and fly the coop.
;(
My
;(
Friday, March 19, 2010
Touch-a-Truck in Westport March 27th
This year's event promises a fleet of crowd-pleasing trucks and vehicles, including the Westport Police Department's inflatable Dive Boat, Trumbull's SWAT vehicle, an ambulance, cement mixer, bulldozer, school bus and limousine. This year's event will also feature an exciting, new attraction, "Roaming Railroads: Train Rides for Kids," as well as the return of the "TheAmazingFunBus," a self-contained, mobile party with the latest video games, including the X-box, Wii and Guitar Hero, plus karaoke with hits from Miley Cyrus, the Jonas Brothers and other favorites.
The hot dog truck from Herb's Place in Norwalk will be on hand, serving hot dogs, egg sandwiches and more. Local gym class-provider, "My Gym," will be present at the event with a "bounce house" as well as an interactive, tumbling space for all children interested and the Connecticut Humane Society will be in attendance along with some of their furry friends! Face painting and hot chocolate, coffee and baked treats also will be available. Last year, the event attracted 400 families who climbed on, rode in and pushed buttons on a wide variety of trucks.
Back by popular demand, the event will start with a "quiet hour" from 9:30-10:30 a.m., for those truck lovers with more sensitive auditory nerves.
The 2010 Touch-A-Truck event will take place on Saturday, March 27, from 9:30 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. at Coleytown Elementary School, 65 Easton Road in Westport. Admission is $20 per family (six or less members).
Proceeds will benefit the Westport Weston Cooperative Nursery School, a NAEYC-accredited preschool, to help fund its continued educational programs for young children. For more information, visit.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
CT-Moms Tag Sale to Benefit the Center for Women and Families
Toys, clothes, electronics, baby gear, house wares, and more! Come shop for a good cause.
CT-Moms, the largest and most active on-line networking organization for Moms in Fairfield County, will be hosting a multi-family tag sale on Saturday, April 24, 2010 from 10am-3pm at Our Lady Star of the Sea Church; 1200 Shippan Avenue in Stamford. The venue was generously donated by the Church, and the sale is a fundraiser for the Center for Women and Families.
This is CT-Moms' second annual tag sale, and last year's helped raise over $1200 for the Domestic Violence Crisis Center!
With a membership of over 250 local moms, CT-Moms expects more than 30 families to come together to sell wares at this event. Each "seller mom" will be in charge of staffing her own table. There will be no charge for buyers to enter. No early-birds, please.
CT-Moms is the premier online networking organization for Mothers in Fairfield County. Membership to CT-Moms is completely free and we are proud to be an amazing resource, both to our membership as well as to our community. Learn more about CT-Moms at www.ctmomsoline.com.
The Center for Women and Families of Eastern Fairfield County, Inc. (CWF) is dedicated to strengthening women and families and to eliminating violence and abuse through education, intervention, advocacy, and community collaboration. Learn more about CWF at http://www.cwfefc.org.
Event Details & RSVP
----------------------
What: CT-Moms 2nd Annual Tag Sale
Who: CT-Moms
When: Sat Apr 24, 2010, 10 am - 3 pm EST
Where: Our Lady Star of the Sea
1200 Shippan Avenue Stamford, CT
RSVP: http://www.bigtent.com/home/
CT-Moms, the largest and most active on-line networking organization for Moms in Fairfield County, will be hosting a multi-family tag sale on Saturday, April 24, 2010 from 10am-3pm at Our Lady Star of the Sea Church; 1200 Shippan Avenue in Stamford. The venue was generously donated by the Church, and the sale is a fundraiser for the Center for Women and Families.
This is CT-Moms' second annual tag sale, and last year's helped raise over $1200 for the Domestic Violence Crisis Center!
With a membership of over 250 local moms, CT-Moms expects more than 30 families to come together to sell wares at this event. Each "seller mom" will be in charge of staffing her own table. There will be no charge for buyers to enter. No early-birds, please.
CT-Moms is the premier online networking organization for Mothers in Fairfield County. Membership to CT-Moms is completely free and we are proud to be an amazing resource, both to our membership as well as to our community. Learn more about CT-Moms at www.ctmomsoline.com.
The Center for Women and Families of Eastern Fairfield County, Inc. (CWF) is dedicated to strengthening women and families and to eliminating violence and abuse through education, intervention, advocacy, and community collaboration. Learn more about CWF at http://www.cwfefc.org.
Event Details & RSVP
----------------------
What: CT-Moms 2nd Annual Tag Sale
Who: CT-Moms
When: Sat Apr 24, 2010, 10 am - 3 pm EST
Where: Our Lady Star of the Sea
1200 Shippan Avenue Stamford, CT
RSVP: http://www.bigtent.com/home/
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